I have so many emotions and feelings today. I can’t believe it’s already been a whole year since you left us. I feel mad that you aren’t here. I feel sad because I preferred my life with you in it. I feel anxious thinking about seeing you in the hospital 1 year ago, fighting for your life just days after learning you had Leukemia. It all escalated so fast.
If you were sitting here, you would be comforting us. If you had a way to actually console us after losing you, I know you would. Because that was who you were. You would be smiling with eyes of love, pointing us to Jesus, and reminding us of eternity.
I can sit with these emotions, and I can simultaneously have hope. It’s one of the things you learn through loss.
It means acknowledging how much it hurts, and grabbing on to the hope we have in Christ. It’s what keeps you going, and being resilient, living in a world without someone who was such a huge part of yours.
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